如何写好一个句子How to write a sentence
2022-10-21 14:22:26 0 举报
AI智能生成
句子是灵魂
作者其他创作
大纲/内容
1. sentence: the sequence of words
Basic element
sentence proposition
propositions are the atoms from which the molecule of the sentence is constructed
the basic unit of writing is the proposition, not the word or even a sequence of words, and we build sentences by putting propositions together.
underlying proposition
I like to think of the written sentence as the part of the iceberg you see above water, while many of its underlying propositions remain out of sight underwater.
“Estranged from his family, ineffectual in his teaching, and disappointed in his writing, James Joyce’s Stephen Dedalus seeks refuge in the life of the mind,
intend vs unintended
Sometimes the way sentences unfold their meaning is the most important meaning they offer.
surprise
tease
test
satisfy
providing pleasure
sentence construction
word choices
paradimatic choices
vertical paradmatic axis
ladder of abstract
degree of precision of vocabulary choices
thesaurus
“Why should a sequence of words be anything but a pleasure?” Gertrude Stein once asked.
a sequence of words
a string of words
serie of words
bunch of words
combination of words
number of words
pleasure
gratification
joy
delight
satisfy
word oders
syntagmatic choice
horizontal syntagmatic axis
syntax
how u put together the words chosen
early or late
“Why should a sequence of words be anything but a pleasure?” Gertrude Stein once asked.
“Why should we get anything but pleasure from a sequence of words?”
modifiers
coordinate
subordinate
sentence to affect writing effetiveness and style
propositional content
word choices
syntax
loose syntax
early
cumulative sentence
generative
heuristic
periodic syntax
delay
periodic sentence
suspensefully
suspensively
sentence combination
coordinate
subordinate
modification
form is content
motion sentence
pace and rhythm
duple rhythm of balance
three beat rhythm of serial construction
loose syntax
early
cumulative sentence
generative
heuristic
periodic syntax
delay
periodic sentence
suspensefully
suspensively
style is content
The style of our sentences is determined by the ways in which we combine not words, but the propositions those words stand for or refer to.
If we have to use a metaphor to explain style, we might better think of the onion, which consists of numerous layers of onion we can peel away until there’s nothing left. The onion is its layers, and those layers don’t contain a core of “onionness,” but they are themselves the onion.
,the way they direct the reader’s thinking, may be at least as important as the information they contain.
but it’s something we frequently forget when we are writing.
a poem should not mean / but be
tougher style
You better believe I like hamburgers,”
sweet style
“Don’t you think hamburgers are just fabulous?”
stuff style
“My gastronomic preferences include, but are not limited to, that peculiarly American version of the sandwich known as a hamburger”
good sentences
1.She was savage and superb, wild-eyed and magnificent; there was something ominous and stately in her deliberate progress.
2. Grammar and rhetoric
sentence as a grammar phenomenon
dead fish in the labotary
studying grammar is more than a little bit like counting the spines of a dead fish.
grammatical descriptions of the sentence are primarily concerned with identifying its parts
Grammar has to do with relationships among words, largely irrespective of their meaning
Or to put this another way, grammar has to do with words, while rhetoric has to do with the way we do things with words.
sentence as a rhetoric phenomenan
Relation reality
live fish in the nature
rhetorical descriptions of the sentence are primarily concerned with identifying that relational reality established when a reader reads or hears the sentence.
Rhetoric, unlike grammar, has to do with both motive and impact, the reasons why we use language to accomplish certain goals, and the extent to which it accomplishes them.
Or to put this another way, grammar has to do with words, while rhetoric has to do with the way we do things with words.
a contemporary understanding of rhetoric best describes it as the “science of human attention-structures.” Rhetoric is about the best ways of getting and holding attention with language, and shaping that attention to achieve particular outcomes.
The main point to remember here is that effectiveness in writing is largely a rhetorical issue, and grammar alone cannot lead us to effective writing.
effective writing
writing that anticipates, shapes, and satisfies a reader’s need for information.
the classical rhetorical trope of stressing the use of conjunctions where a comma would suffice, in this case building a sense of great calm. A summary of the propositional content of this sentence would sound quite simple, but the rhetorical and affective impact of the sentence is carefully designed and employs a sophisticated rhetorical pattern.
Effective writing is largely determined by how well the writer’s efforts respond to the situation that has occasioned the writing, the writer’s purpose in writing, and the reader’s needs.
impressive writing
What I term an impressive sentence will frequently display some form of “elegance” that may at first seem above and beyond the requirements of effectiveness.
writing that calls attention to itself through complexity, elegance, or some other rhetorical flourish—is gaudy writing, overly lush, opulent, and mannered
“impressive prose style” in the same way mathematicians refer to an elegant solution to a math problem.
There may be only one elegant solution to a math problem; there may be many different impressive solutions to a problem we address with language.
no amount of sophisticated vocabulary or complicated syntax can make a sentence effective or impressive unless that sentence accomplishes the task it was intended to accomplish.
style
Style is a concept so rich, so expansive, so subjective, and so contested that any attempt to define it immediately encounters resistance, if not outright hostility.
Young writers often suppose that style is a garnish for the meat of prose, a sauce by which a dull dish is made palatable. Style has no such separate entity. It is nondetachable, unfilterable.
Style is what the writer writes and/or what the reader read
It’s also a definition that refuses to distinguish style from content or meaning. I made the case earlier for the notion that style is content,
Language is style, style is meaning, meaning is form, and all of these terms refer equally to every word that we write.
Good Sentences
The boy, crouched on his nail keg at the back of the crowded room, knew he smelled cheese, and more: from where he sat he could see the ranked shelves close-packed with the solid, squat, dynamic shapes of tin cans whose labels his stomach read, not from the lettering which meant nothing to his mind but from the scarlet devils and the silver curve of fish—this, the cheese which he knew he smelled and the hermetic meat which his intestines believed he smelled coming in intermittent gusts momentary and brief between the other constant one, the smell and sense just a little of fear because mostly of despair and grief, the old fierce pull of the blood.
“A Clean, Well-Lighted Place”: “In the daytime, the street was dusty, but at night the dew settled the dust and the old man liked to sit late because he was deaf and now at night it was quiet and he felt the difference.”
While the propositions in this sentence are very short and are simply tacked together by conjunctions, the repeated use of and to link these propositions taps into the emotional power of polysyndeton, the classical rhetorical trope of stressing the use of conjunctions where a comma would suffice, in this case building a sense of great calm. A summary of the propositional content of this sentence would sound quite simple, but the rhetorical and affective impact of the sentence is carefully designed and employs a sophisticated rhetorical pattern.
3. Propostion
Prose Style Rests on the Arrangement of Propositions in the Sentence
Modifiers
Like LEGOs, free modifiers can be stuck together lots of different ways.
Each modifying phrase contains or suggests a verb form, but not an active verb, and none of the modifying phrases can stand by itself as a sentence, even though each represents one of the propositions underlying the sentence.
“He drove the car carefully, his shaggy hair whipped by the wind, his eyes hidden behind wraparound mirror shades, his mouth set in a grim smile, a .38 Police Special on the seat beside him, the corpse stuffed in the trunk.”
The proper place in the sentence for the word or group of words that the writer desires to make most prominent is usually the end.”
When a sentence works like a mini-narrative, telling a kind of story that has a surprise ending, I think it will almost always catch a reader’s attention and remind the reader of the creative mind that crafted that sentence, and that’s one of the functions of style: to remind us of the mind behind the sentences we read.
good sentences
These are the times that try men’s souls.
Times like these try men’s souls
How trying it is to live in these times!
These are trying times for men’s souls
Soulwise, these are trying times.
“I came, I saw, I conquered,”
After arriving and looking around, I conquered
The Power of implied or embedded proposition
Most of us have been taught that the base clause of a sentence, the sentence’s subject and predicate, is responsible for advancing its most important proposition, and this is simply not the case.
It is only when we consider the emotional effect of the way we order and combine the propositions that underlie the sentences we speak or write that we can consider ourselves in control of our writing.
the way underlying propositions may actually carry more weight or have a greater impact on the reception of a sentence than does its surface.
Walking to the taffrail, I was in time to make out, on the very edge of a darkness thrown by a towering black mass like the very gateway of Erebus—yes, I was in time to catch an evanescent glimpse of my white hat left behind to mark the spot where the secret sharer of my cabin and of my thoughts, as though he were my second self, had lowered himself into the water to take his punishment: a free man, a proud swimmer striking out for a new destiny.
Ohman then notes that the base clause of this sentence, “I was in time,” which is repeated, is expanded by the embedded or supporting propositions “I walked to the taffrail,” “I made out,” and “I caught,” ostensibly focusing our attention on the narrator, who is the subject of those five clauses.
We can almost hear the music swell as Conrad’s narrator marks the departure of Leggatt, whom the narrator has helped escape formal trial for a murder at sea, having decided that Leggatt’s action was justified by an extreme set of circumstances, an early brief for situational ethics. Ohman sees in this sentence a just representation of its author’s mind “energetically stretching to subdue a dazzling experience outside the self.”
a useful reminder that the surface structure of a sentence may rest on a large number of unwritten propositions, and that the style of a sentence includes the way it invokes, suggests, or assumes some of those propositions, as well as the way it explicitly represents others.
William Gibson’s Pattern Recognition, a novel full of nifty sentences: “She uses the remote as demonstrated, drapes drawing quietly aside to reveal a remarkably virtual-looking skyline, a floating jumble of electric Lego, studded with odd shapes you somehow wouldn’t see elsewhere, as if you’d need special Tokyo add-ons to build this at home.”
4. How a sentence grows
kernel sentence
They raised the flag.
They raised the flag, triumphantly racing it up to the top of the flagpole” or “They raised the flag, its green striped fabric tattered and torn by bullets.”
They slept
“They slept, the man simply collapsing on the bed, the woman first seeing what TV channels were available.”
expanding kernel sentence
Thomas Berger is one of America’s most respected but underread novelists.”
‘Thomas Berger, the author of Little Big Man, his classic retelling of the story of the Old West, is one of America’s most respected but underread novelists’ is for me the most important sentence in an article I read about unjustly neglected writers.”
cumulative sentences
“Cumulative sentences fascinate me with their ability to add information that actually makes the sentence easier to read and more satisfying, flying in the face of the received idea that cutting words rather than adding them is the most effective way to improve writing.”
Cumulative sentences, those loose sentences that quickly posit a base clause and then elaborate it by adding modifying words and phrases, fascinate me with their ability to add information that actually makes the sentence easier to read and more satisfying, answering questions as it provides more detail and explanation, flying in the face of the received idea that cutting words rather than adding them is the most effective way to improve writing.”
Cumulative sentences that start with a brief base clause and then start picking up new information, much as a snowball gets larger as it rolls downhill, fascinate me with their ability to add information that actually makes the sentence easier to read and more satisfying because it starts answering questions as quickly as an inquisitive reader might think of them, using each modifying phrase to clarify what has gone before, and to reduce the need for subsequent explanatory sentences, flying in the face of the received idea that cutting words rather than adding them is the most effective way to improve writing, reminding us that while in some cases, less is indeed more, in many cases, more is more, and more is what our writing needs.”
tough guy style
Highly predicative prose isn’t long on explanations. It has a kind of take-it-or-leave-it quality. This is macho-speak that bluntly posits information without reflecting upon it or elaborating it, and we find it exactly where we might expect to find it:
His name was Rambo, and he was just some nothing kid for all anybody knew, standing by the pump of a gas station at the outskirts of Madison, Kentucky. He had a long, heavy beard, and his hair was hanging down over his ears to his neck, and he had a hand out trying to thumb a ride from a car that was stopped at the pump.
Then he would throw down his rifle and hold up his hands and yell that he was surrendering. The idea revolted him. He couldn’t let himself merely stand and wait for them. He’d never done it before. It was disgusting.
We refer to these short, simple sentences and simple compound sentences as being predicative, and they are characteristic of the style Walker Gibson calls “tough”
highly predicative style is tough because its speaker, Frederic Henry, Hemingway’s protagonist, says only what he could see or directly experience during a limited period of time, linking observations primarily with conjunctions, stating information without processing it. This predicative style is very effective when creating tough-guy characters, men and women who act, but don’t think much about what they do.
connective
1) we can add propositional information by using conjunctions or other connective words to add to the sentence in much the same way we might add more boxcars to a train;
The girl raised the flag.
“The girl raised the flag and was proud to see it waving once again over the town square.”
“The girl raised the flag because she knew that doing so would inspire her compatriots.”
subordinate
(2) we can add propositional information by subordinating some parts of the sentence to other parts;
The second strategy for building a sentence is to add new information, but to make it subordinate to information in the kernel.
The girl, who had just realized she was the only survivor, raised the flag.
The girl raised the flag that had long been a symbol of the resistance movement.
When we subordinate information by putting it in clauses introduced by relative pronouns, such as who, which, or that, we can call our syntactic strategy “subordinative.”
adjctive
(3) we can add propositional information by using modifying words and phrases that turn underlying propositions into modifiers.
The third main strategy for building a sentence is to add new information by boiling that information down to a single modifying word or phrase.
The young girl raised the flag.”
The girl raised the flag, a triumphant grin on her face, the flag’s green striped fabric tattered and torn by bullets, her bravery an inspiration to her compatriots.”
adjectival steps, specifically the kind of adjectival step taken by modifying phrases in cumulative sentences, intrigue me most because I think they offer tremendous rewards for the writer.
Josephine Miles,In her 1967 book Style and Proportion: The Language of Prose and Poetry
Prose proceeds forward in time by steps less closely measured, but not less propelling, than the steps of verse.”
While every few feet, verse reverses, repeats, and reassesses the pattern of its progression, prose picks up momentum toward its forward goal in strides variably adapted to its burdens and purposes. Both use steps; neither merely flows; each may be perceived and followed by its own stages of articulation.
“Poetry calls attention to its movement by meter, by line stops, by sentences, by rhyme schemes, by stanzas, while prose measures its unfolding in ways much less obvious, but no less certain.”
Early in the morning, in a small town, near the highway, because he was hungry and though he was in danger, the young boy, looking neither to left, nor to right, climbed the path to the city hall.”
“Early this morning in a small highway town, hungry and in danger, the young boy, looking neither left nor right, climbed the city-hall path.”
Miles’s approach to sentence style is the idea that the sentence unfolds in time by taking steps
The first step in writing longer, more effective sentences that grow by taking adjectival steps is to start from a relatively short and simple base clause and then build the longer sentence around it.
Say things directly, the subject first and then what the subject is doing. Then trail the modifiers, putting the modifying phrases at the end of the straightforward declarations, expanding and contracting them, adjusting their rhythm as you need to, creating texture, refining with detail.
Chris Anderson emphasizes this point in his really helpful writing text, Free/Style
Mother Goose poem
This Is the House That Jack Built
This Is the House That Jack Built
This is the house that Jack built.
This is the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the cat,
That killed the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the farmer sowing his corn,
That kept the cock that crowed in the morn,
That waked the priest all shaven and shorn,
That married the man all tattered and torn,
That kissed the maiden all forlorn,
That milked the cow with the crumpled horn,
That tossed the dog,
That worried the cat,
That killed the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the cat,
That killed the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
This is the farmer sowing his corn,
That kept the cock that crowed in the morn,
That waked the priest all shaven and shorn,
That married the man all tattered and torn,
That kissed the maiden all forlorn,
That milked the cow with the crumpled horn,
That tossed the dog,
That worried the cat,
That killed the rat,
That ate the malt
That lay in the house that Jack built.
He went to speak to Mrs. Bean, tiny among the pillows, her small toothless mouth open like an “O,” her skin stretched thin and white over her bones, her huge eye-sockets and eyes in a fixed, infant-like stare, and her sparse white hair short and straggling over her brow.
Tufte, probably our most accomplished current student of sentence structure, is a big fan of adding propositions to sentences by adding free modifying words and phrases following a short base clause, noting again and again in her writing how this technique allows us to write sentences that can grow to considerable length without becoming hard to follow or unpleasant to the ear.
5. Rymthm of cumulative sentences
4 principles
addition
movement
level of generality
textures
The principle is this: When you write, you make a point not by subtracting as though you sharpened a pencil, but by adding. When you put one word after another, your statement should be more precise the more you add. If the result is otherwise, you have added the wrong thing, or you have added more than was needed.
What you wish to say is found not in the noun but in what you add to qualify the noun. The noun is only a grappling iron to hitch your mind to the reader’s. The noun by itself adds nothing to the reader’s information; it is the name of something he knows already, and if he does not know it, you cannot do business with him. The noun, the verb, and the main clause serve merely as a base on which meaning will rise. The modifier is the essential part of any sentence.
Logic of cumulative sentence level
6. Cumulative sentences
type
coordinate
The main appeal and power of coordinate cumulative construction comes from its distinctive rhythm and very simple logical relations among the steps the sentence takes.
motion without movement.
backfilling rather than moving forward
We caught two bass, hauling them in briskly as though they were mackerel, pulling them over the side of the boat in a businesslike manner without any landing net, and stunning them with a blow on the back of the head.”
subordinate
The main appeal of subordinate cumulative construction comes from its ability to advance the sentence into new territory,
making it particularly effective when used to describe a process or to follow something that unfolds in time.
As opposed to the rigid and unmovable logic of the coordinate cumulative sentence, where every new modifying phrase ties back to the base clause, the subordinate cumulative sentence is loosey-goosey and can move on to new information.
that freedom to move forward can reach a point of diminishing returns, when or if subordinate modifying phrases move so far away from the base clause that it looks as if the sentence has run wild.
He dipped his hands in the bichloride solution and shook them, a quick shake, fingers down, like the fingers of a pianist above the keys”) and see if you can supply a new base clause and then develop it by adding three subordinate phrases, each pointing to the im
mixed
Her face was sad and lovely with bright things in it, bright eyes and a bright passionate mouth, but there was an excitement in her voice that men who had cared for her found difficult to forget: a singing compulsion, a whispered “Listen,” a promise that she had done gay, exciting things just a while since and that there were gay, exciting things hovering in the next hour.
Slenderly, languidly, their hands set lightly on their hips, the two young women preceded us out onto a rosy-colored porch, open toward the sunset, where four candles flickered on the table in the diminished wind.
Perhaps some unbelievable guest would arrive, a person infinitely rare and to be marveled at, some authentically radiant young girl who with one fresh glance at Gatsby, one moment of magical encounter, would blot out those five years of unwavering devotion.
compositon
clauses
phrases
participal
gerund
infinitive
prep
verbs
verbals
place
left branch
mid branch
right brand
分支主题
0 条评论
下一页